dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Our brains have an emergency blowjob override switch. You saw proof tonight.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
Ok let me just clear up this blowjob thing first so we can talk about your grandpa
god, I have more takeout restaurants in my contacts than friends
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
you're hired as official boob wrangler
Is it a bad thing for a seven year old to call one an alcoholic? Asking for a friend..
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
Randomize
