come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
Last night, my friend changed all my contacts in my phone. I have been texted by Batman, Donatello, and Hermione Granger. I have no idea who they are, and it doesn't upset me at all.
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
Found the puke drawer
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Remember when you gave their 80 year old doorman a line of molly at 5am?
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
Randomize