So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
this guy is so high, he just ate half of a frozen blueberry muffin and half of a frozen poppyseed muffin, then proceeded to make a "hybrid poppyberry muffin"
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
I will fuck him senseless, no need for a priest.
I only have one eye to read your texts because I just stabbed one out after reading that last text.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
A special kind of bond is formed between two people when they act as a pee shield for one another for drunken pisses in an alleyway
True strength comes from lack of pants
I just want to get drunk and not have to worry about you leaving me at the bar.
Randomize
