guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Just found out the guy that gave me herpes died. now everytime I get a flare up, it'll be like he's coming back to say hello
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He kept trying to make out with me but I was just trying to show him Shrek memes
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
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