She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
just saw 2 fat kids fight for the last slice of pizza. Litteraly fight. God Bless America
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
I know you're here! I can hear your phoneeeee. Wake up and do illegal things with me.
Randomize
