it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
His penis makes me feel like a mystic dragon sliding down a turbo slide covered in white gumdrops and sour cashews
Same.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
And regarding bottomless mimosas stopping at 1 pm, there was a chick who drove her car into the back of the bar. Blame that bitch, not you peeing in the koi pond.
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
You had sex with a kid to spare him the shame of being a virgin. Evidence is on my side.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Sorry I fucked your cousin. Again. I just wanted him to take me on his boat.
Randomize