Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
i never told you how having a club foot got me laid
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
It wasn't really sex. It was just rolling around, trying to make sure his dick didn't end up in my ass.
You disappeared for an hour and showed back up with handfuls of bratwursts and yelled at my girlfriend that if she didn't eat them, that the nazis win
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
he's been dating her for 18 months and cheating on her with me for 16. if that's not commitment, i don't know what is.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Randomize
