How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
quitting drinking is the number 5 new years resolution but number 4 is enjoying life more which one do you think im going to pick
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Can you pick me up a bottle of make-an-ass-of-myself tonight?
Do you want cuervo gold or silver?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
why do you keep saying "she looks like a porn star" like thats a bad thing?
I have meat and whiskey. will you bring condoms?
He's so in love with you that you could fuck a blood relative and he'd be like "I just want you to be happy"
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
Randomize
