I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
