She said "You blew my mind last night." and I said "nah, I just blew my load." and her mom heard.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I got groped on the dancefloor by both grooms. I love gay weddings
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
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