Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
2 hours later, she made her cat watch the waterfall scene from Homeward Bound to teach her how good she has it here.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
Soooo I think my neighbor just saw me masturbating on my porch
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
DRUNK COOKIES
Are you drunk or are the cookies drunk or are these cookies that get you drunk?
Yes
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize