Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I'm not saying he's gay. Just that he prob knows what a dick tastes like
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
I was riding her and she yelled "fuck me" then someone in the room next door yelled "you don't have to say it if youre doing it."
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
May the one with the liver that just won't quit win
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
she fell THROUGH the wall. All in all id have to say that my neighbors where pretty chill about it tho.
I basically gave Miranda rights to the guy I hooked up with, jus so we were all clear what was happening
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
BUT YOU GOTTA TASTE THE RAINBOW!!
That's what Skittles are for!
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