Is it normal to miss your booty call?
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Should I mail that cop his nightstick or just throw it away?
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
