love how google fills in search terms for you, today for example, i ran a query for "why do girls get t"
and google finished it w/ "ramp stamps."
I felt less weird knowing others had searched this before me.
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
Want to come to my BBQ and Blow party?
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
I walked downstairs and he was standing in nothing but his boxers with his dick hanging out warming up eggs in the microwave.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Sitting in airport bathroom. Guy walks into toilet next to me and announces "I want to apologize to the entire airport for what I'm about to do"
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I really don't know where my pants are, but that's not the problem. When are you going to unlock the door?
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
Randomize
