and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
we've been dating more than a month and i just realized there's no hair on his chest..
you've had sex with him. you must've seen him naked.
nah, i feel like naked sex would be getting too serious for us..
dude that bald bouncer just did a body shot off of brian and then kicked us out for trying to charge him for it
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Somewhere in the night I send my Dad a text stating "YOU failed as a parent"
Maybe tomorrow I'll be drunk again and can provide you with texts at a more reasonable hour. Here's hoping. GOodnight. Tebow loves you
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I wore heels to a golf store in hopes of getting laid. I've hit a new all time low.
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
Randomize
