He spelled "beautiful" wrong in his text
Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
True strength comes from lack of pants
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
