i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
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