We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
got hammered last night, woke up this morning to 38 texts that varied from "you fucking asshole" to "i can be there in 10 minutes"
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
Ask him about a girl named Meg then give a disappointed and disapproving face.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
Randomize
