his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Is it inappropriate to be Drs. Willy Fister and Jess Hewill as a couples costume for Halloween?
Oh we're gynecologists
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
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