Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
A German guy asked me to take a bath with him. I can't tell if he's just an eccentric European or a run of the mill creep.
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
No idea who's grandma but people were just running around naked
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
