I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
I'm sitting in the corner at the bar with a poolstick in case a brawl breaks out. Some crazy shit is going down and I'm trying to show my feathers like a horny peacock.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I looked like a tiger in heat. He didn't know if I wanted to fuck him or eat him.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
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