Sorry, its so late. Remember your fat friend with huge boobs. i need her number..its an emergency
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
time to smoke my breakfast
the black eye was caused by a 12 year old girl in a vampire costume who punched you in the face after you aggresively screamed "TEAM JACOB!" in her face & howled at the moon...
Semen is not good for contacts.
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
I told him that we shouldn't complicate things. He responded with a dick pic.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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