At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
That moment when your fucking in an airport bathroom and forget to lock the door. That poor man...scarred forever...
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
Never in my life have I been so excited to nap as I am right now.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
