the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
Sorry, I was trapped in a small closet behind a washer. What's up?
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
i was really depressed when i left the health dept this morning after i had to write a higher number next to "partners" than "age"
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
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