maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
I'M GETTING MARRIED!
YOU'RE STILL MARRIED!
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
The horrors my penis has endured I wouldn't wish upon any man.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
RESPOND QUICKLY THIS IS AN EMERGENCY!!! LITERALLY AN 11 INCH DICK!!!!! HELP.
Randomize
