you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Oh I know babe. You're shining beacon of adult responsibility. That's why I go down on you.
I go down on you because abs
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
he had hair everywhere except his balls
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
