she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
his eyes are fucked up, he bumped into the cabinet while standing in my office, and he's pounding chicken soup, and he must have chewed on 8 pieces of gum before he got here.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
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