Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
I am unable to type or say "unprotected, receptive anal sex" with a straight face. clearly, HIV was a poor research paper topic choice.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
I'm like a magical alcohol dispenser. I pulled this kahlua out of my vagina.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
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