I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
It's like God shit irony all over that family
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
We don't have any ice, so I'm using the frozen cognac to reduce the swelling on Abby's toe.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Randomize
