drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
Two things. 1 - I want to apologize for my drunkeness last night. 2 - I want to pre-apologize for my anticipated drunkeness tonight.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I can't tell which way is up. Too many corners around his house too. An arbitary assimilation of edges.
Christ, I swear you are the high man's Dr. Seuss.
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
What did you spend the night in her closet?
She said she was saving me for breakfast and locked me in there
Randomize
