Church boner. Awkwardddd
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
It's hard being an adult. And by that I mean it's hard to tell the boy you like who rejected you that you can't share a room with him at white party because you don't want to see him bang other boys.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
Randomize
