just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
After you puked in the bathtub you claimed you were never eating quesadillas again and you never even ate a quesadilla
Y'know i appreciate how accepting you are of me being a terrible person.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize
