come over anyways, right now, right this second
it can be a super quick quicky, then you can go back to studying
wow, that sounds SO fun, please stop enticing me with premature ejaculation
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
I was asked last night if Magnum makes a XXL..... I don't think I've ever broken this many condoms in my life
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
