Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?
Beautiful, beautiful reality
Yea, I had a chaperone thankfully. I'm in the fetal position attempting to eat captain crunch now.
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
Randomize
