found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
I'm eating Arby's in the bathtub because I'm an adult and I do what I want
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
