I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Now that the olympics are over we have no excuse for getting belligerently drunk for nationalism every night.
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He recreated the night that started all my mothers days. We shared a joint, drank Boones Farm, and dry humped to the Beastie Boys. Then I cried over MCA's death. Best. Gift. Ever.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I can barely operate my hands; what makes you think I can operate my dick
Randomize
