So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
some guy just got out of his chair quietly. Laid down on the floor and is now asleep in between rows in my lecture hall. He must have had a rough night.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
No. I'm laying on the floor naked. I almost made it to the shower
This could be the definition of living by yourself
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
