I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Your place is a magnet for either righteous parties or crippling alcohol dependency. Lets find out which together
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
I just drove my booty call to his booty call, if that isn't spreading the love, I don't know what is.
It's accurate though. I am legitimately passionate about pickles. I crave pickles the same way I crave sex. It is a deep rooted animalistic need
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
I feel really sorry for my toilet right now
Randomize
