My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
How do I tell if what I'm covered in is pee or cum?
If you ever find a dick that big chop it off and bring it to me.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
Randomize
