I need to keep friends like you around just in case hell grades on a curve.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
I asked what it takes to be a good delivery driver, my new boss said "always keep these in your vehicle" as he handed me a flashlight and a blunt. I'm going to like this job.
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