Eating a girl out that was just in the ocean does not make her taste like saltwater taffy
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
My diabetic professor who apparently didn't eat anything all day keeps passing out. I gave him a joint. He's gonna be fine.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
I feel like every man should aspire to get a blowjob from a sword swallower.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
Randomize
