Will you blow on my dice?
So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
No, seriously, I've slept with 3 guys this month.
It's ok, February is a short month
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Wait, I'm confused. I EMPTIED the bottle? as in consumed it? I'm impressed with myself.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
Randomize
