i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
Currently listening to 'Just Put it in Your Mouth.' remember when i went through that phase?
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
A guy with no shirt on and a eyepatch just got out of the car beside me. After he slammed his door into mine. This is our hometown.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Randomize
