At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Rob and I are cross faded and the only one taking care of us is a drunk person who's making us dance.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
When the state fair security guard came to yell at her for having outside food and drink she threatened to kick him if he tried to stop her and then she proceeded to chug the whole bottle.
classic
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize
