i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
It's like you are the superhero of getting jizzed on
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
When I say drunk I mean that in the process of filming a fratstar cooking show they threw a keg into the street where the police came to clean it up. now all they can say is "THE KEG GOT ARRESTED."
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
Randomize
