What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He must have found my secret supply of blow and took a bump before we left the house. Rude.
He could of at least asked
I was standing in my mom's kitchen in only my neon green thong, eating pizza over the garbage can, and sobbing while he was yelling at me.
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
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