Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'
I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
So note to self oboe reeds soaked in Apple Rubinoff sound GREAT.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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