that's when I learned why R Kelly peed on that bitch
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
Nothing gets you judged faster than having cum in your hair at the gas station.
I was on my way last night when some asshole yelled "make better life choices" out the window of his car. I felt so self conscious I went home.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
