tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
They have a house rule that you get a composite for every 5 guys you sleep with. Where should I hang my new one?
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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