She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
how the hell were we supposed to out run the cops in a bus?
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
I told her to not worry about it. Lone Star is an excellent first trimester beer.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
Randomize
